reminiscing on my life

cannot sleep...all because i kept thinking about why i made the decision i made. why??? I have few regrets in my life..the biggest was about my ex..Ina..she change me completely, I became totally the opposite of what i imagine i will become.. however, fate brings me together with my gf, Farah. Probably I need to meet Ina before i can meet Farah which is what i fantasize/imagine and want as a gf. her character and personality really makes me questioned, why i can be with Ina for that 3 hell years instead with someone like Farah.

I feel i have wasted the 3 years of my life...fuck.

But, i have to look on the future and forget the past but at the same time learn from the past. Ive learned that you must follow your heart when some decision is hard to make. Logic play a part as well but when its about love, logic is second.

I can explain, with Ina, I realised that she cant be the one. I just knew it. But because I followed my logic that I need to continue this hell hole relationship mainly because i have been with her for 3 years, I suffered as a consequences.

huh.. thankfully, i have found my right one. And my heart/gut tells me that Farah is the one. without a doubt.

hopefully she is the one. insya Allah.